Entries from March 1, 2009 - April 1, 2009
Walking the dog when you are a teen: 1) Put something on feet or not. 2) Put leash on dog because it is the law. 3) Walk/run.
Walking the dog when you are approaching 50: 1) Purchase good quality athletic shoes with excellent arch support and purchase no-blister wicking socks. 2) Use a no tug harness to protect your back. Put leash on dog because if for some reason she gets away you will never be able to catch her. Plus it is the law. 3) Walk with your dog looking back at you every now and then wishing you would walk faster. 4) Upon returning home apply BenGay to lower back and self medicate using ibprophine as needed. 5) Collapse on couch for 10 minutes.
It has again been pointed out to me that I tend to write about Ichabod when he is being shall we say……challenging. This is true
Now is the time to praise good men.
Ichabod has completed his commitment to being an Upward basketball coach. From the Upward website,
“Upward is a fun, reliable, passionate and encouraging sports experience for boys and girls, in K5 through sixth grade. Upward provides first class, organized and detailed sports programming in basketball, soccer, flag football and cheerleading.”
Upward is a faith based program that is great for kids. As a parent of teens I love it because it provides an opportunity for service to the community and the church for older teens. We do so much for our kids. We sometimes accidently train them to think they are always to be on the receiving end of someone else's efforts.
Coach Ichabod worked with 1st and 2nd grade boys. He would come home from his weekly practice tired. “You have no idea how busy those kids are.” He come home from their weekly game excited about his team. He served as a responsible adult with other adults and he started this time of service and completed it without any parental oversight (TYL).
Well done son.
How does your teen serve in his or her community?
Thank you to everyone who took the time to comment during my Week of No Complaining. I greatly appreciate your encouragement, your insights and your humor.
Thank you to:
Ang: How did you do girl?
MyJoyz A Taste of Heaven
An extra Thank You to Carol at She Live. Carol, your comment was so helpful.
“Questions can be powerful. It requires the other person to articulate what needs to happen so you don't have to and helps them internalize the information.”
This is an approach I have not tried in parenting semi-adults. It invited their participation! There is a novel idea.
The day is not yet over but I don’t think or post about my blog on Sundays so I am writing now and setting to post on Sunday. (How cool is that!) This has been a useful exercise. I will spare you the “This has changed my life” comment because I am pretty sure once I am PMSing I will allow a complaint or two to slip out.
My husband completed our taxes today which just about assures that there will be a minor fight today (There was…sigh) So much tension to send the government information it all ready has and only desires so if we get something wrong they can charge us more…sigh…(was that a complaint or a statement of fact?)
I did learn I tend to use complaining as an ineffective method of communicating with my kids. That most of my complaints are about petty, temporary circumstances due to living with maturing people. That when I am focus on things that cause me to be grateful I am far less likely to complain even if life that day isn’t perfect. That a little self-control on my part can contribute greatly to the overall peace of the household.
If I wanted to build on this experience it would be with A Week of Praise and Thanksgiving, focusing on the good God has allowed in my circumstances, including the thing the maturing people I live with do right, well or with honor. That might be an interesting and worthwhile challenge. Something to think about…..
How was your experience with not complaining?
I am offering a contest (special opportunity) to e-card users, leave a comment 1 entry, write a post and link either in a comment . Twitter, tweet, facebook, stumble etc 2 more enteries, just leave a comment telling what you did. 2 lucky randomly chosen winners will get 500ec’s each. All entrants will get a shout out link in a summery post Wenesday.
Day 5: Doing better about not complaining. Whining seems to be a habit for me. It helps not to be PMSing this week or have no real problems with the kids. The teen did not make it to school on time for reasons he though valid. We, his parents did not share his view. Instead of fighting with him, I just repeated twice why he doesn’t get the car this weekend. (And threatened to take it next weekend, which is his girl’s friends prom weekend.) But I did not complain about his behavior after our conversation. I really do have less to say, so this has helped me realize how much my complaining has drowned out communication with my kids. My ESSV was gone all day yesterday so I was self- regulating!!
Day 6 Almost done. Tomorrow is the last day of the Week Of No Complaining. For some reason yesterday my blog would not enable comments and had that weird widget. But I am not complaining…yet.
When you can't complain, you wind up more focused on the problem and not how you feel about the problem. Interesting insight!
The comment problem seems to have resolved itself.
I am offering a contest (inducement) to e-card users, leave a comment 1 entry, write a post and link either in a comment . Twitter, tweet, facebook, stumble etc 2 more enteries, just leave a comment telling what you did. 2 lucky randomly chosen winners will get 500ec’s each. All entrants will get a shout out link in a summery post next week.