Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Entries from September 1, 2008 - October 1, 2008

Entries from September 1, 2008 - October 1, 2008


Blogs Worth A Click: The Political Addition

I enjoy reading political blogs. Because I am a conservative, I enjoy reading blogs from both sides of the aisle. Conservatives are known for our ability to laugh at ourselves. After all, we did help elect our current president. We have learned to either laugh at ourselves or cry in shame. In our defense more conservative listen to Rush and NPR, that liberals listen to NPR and Rush.

With Sarah Palin running for president (by 2012 I hope), it is fun to be a conservative again. Watching the left explain why this outside the beltline, working, middle class mother of 5, having more experience balancing a budget that anyone else running, a son fighting overseas ( I’ve come to think if you are going to start an endless war at least one of your child should be requires to be in harms way. Maybe then the war will not be endless) isn’t qualified to be the first woman one breath away from the presidency is kinda fun. Perhaps they think only a woman who has slept with a former president qualifies. Where is Jennifer Flowers when you need her?

In no particular order:

Caledonian Comment: A British Blog that covers some American Politics. Interesting liberal writer, can be given to rants, hates the Monarchy

Copious Dissent: Well written, conservative blog with an unique perspective on political events

Polisicks: Funny, liberal, lots of video clips

First Left At the Door:. Very liberal, very funny, often insightful. Avoid of you are a conservative who can’t laugh at yourself.

Matt-Speak Not sure where he is politically. I get a kick out of his comments on anything and everyone.

I would love to add to this list as the election nears. Please feel free to leave your favorite political blog in a comment. The conservatives are unrepresented. I know we are out there some place.


Parenting Semi-Adults: The Truth about Princess

My eldest daughter Princess was reading through my blog. She noted that I only mention her when I am aggravated about something. That is true. It is far easier to write about laundry room problems and over drawn debit cards or college decisions than the good things. I admit I take the good for granted.

There is a lot of unexplored territory in parenting a semi-adult. Writing for the blog helps me clarify my thoughts and think in terms of principle instead of I want to ground her. I like grounding, so much simpler than thinking through what I want to see in her as we finish her upraising. I my defense I try to be balanced. I post about my faults also. That does not seem to come across to the kids. They still see me through MOM glasses. MOM glasses filter any information that might make mom seem human. I wore them with my mom also.

The truth about Princess is she is a wonderful young woman. She works hard at her job and her schoolwork. She is a good friend. She is wise. I have listened to her as she talks with her friends about “life issues” and have been amazed at the wisdom that flows from her lips. Where did she learn that at such a young age?

She is brave and confident. I was so painfully shy at her age I watch in awe as she sails into new situation, easy or hard facing the challenge instead of running from it. She faces life at 18 with the confidence I did develop until well into my 30’s. Princess is usually empathic, often kind and she has a biting wit. She can gently lob an insult and you don’t realize you have been struck until you think about it later. (Not necessarily a good thing but it does make her interesting.)

She has never given us any real trouble: no drugs, drinking or criminal behavior. I like most all her friends, even the odd ones. She has dated the same handsome, faith-filled, football playing, creative, responsible, younger, young man for the last 2 years. To give you an idea: Some time in a conversation, Princess mentioned she liked kola bears. For Christmas, the above-mentioned young man made her a stuffed kola bear by hand from a pattern he designed (because he couldn’t find a kola pattern.)

At 18, she has a relationship with Jesus that is independent of her father and me. She is active member in another church even though she still lives at home. I would like to take credit for who Princess is at this stage of her life but I know it is her relationship with Jesus that shapes her heart and mind and impacts her world.

The truth about Princess is she is at heart the King’s daughter.

Is it easier for you to talk about the struggles concerning your kids or the good stuff?


Getting From Here to There: Intro

Raising kids is challenging. Raising future adults is more challenging. The difference between raising kids and raising future adults is the deliberateness on the part of the parents in developing character into their children. We have a tough parenting situation right now. Some other family members were complaining about how we (meaning I) are dealing with the situation. I responded this was not an issue of training as if more information would alter the child’s behavior. This is a heart issue. Am I surprised we are facing this issue? I was overwhelmed at the intensity of the emotion involved. I am not surprised at the heart attitude revealed. Character training reveals heart attitudes both honoring and dishonoring.

American parents oft times mix up achievement training and character training. We teach our 2 year olds the alphabet and our 3 year olds to read. We find the best preschools, schools, camps and experiences to give our kids an edge in life. If the kids perform well, we are tempted to think they are people of character. High achievement and character, while they interact in a life worth living, is not the same thing. We have seen the difference blazoned in the media recently. Under stress, the cracks in John Edwards’s character were revealed. Some of what he has achieved is now lost because of his lack of character.

Are Edward’s parents responsible for his lack of moral diligence? No, adults are responsible for their own behavior. Not knowing his parents I am still willing to bet had John lived out what he had learned at home, he would have given a keynote address at the DNC. Character matters.

Character training in children gives parents the opportunity to transfer values in their family. It offers protection for their children as adults in similar way achievement training can give an edge to children to get a head as adults.

For Christian parents character training is an opportunity we can use to reveal the character of our amazing God to our children.

Next week: Where to start? A vision for the future.


Blog Marriage in Real Life: Understanding Men: Nagging

My husband does not like to be nagged. I have always understood this in theory. It took me, oh about 19 years to understand how the theory was to be applied in our marriage. In the hope of saving some young woman decades of frustration, I would like to explain how to avoid being perceived as nagging your man.

Part of my learning curve was understanding that men and women define the verb“nagging” differently.

A woman only perceives herself as nagging if she has to ask similar question on a given topic more than four times in a 2 hour period. For example: Will you take the garbage out please? Did you take the garbage out? Did you take the garbage out yet? Are you planning to take the garbage out in the next 24 hours or would you prefer I hire someone to so it? 63.28% of adult women think this is a reasonable series of questions to ask on a topic of taking out the garbage over a 2 hour period. Asking a fifth time, instead of just going ahead and hiring someone, constitutes nagging.

In contrast, 100% of men think that after the first question (Will you take out the garbage please?) any mention of the word garbage in their presence within the next 192 hours constitutes nagging on the part of their wives. This perception holds true whether they have actually taken the garbage out or not.

Having understood the perceptual differences, I looked for ways to overcome them. There aren’t any.

I have discovered through trail and error that sometimes it is wiser in the long run (but a definite aggravation in the short run) to love people as they are, not as you want them to be. If my husband agrees to do a specific task and doesn’t follow through,

I have to my amazement, discovered I have options other than nagging as to how I respond to his behavior:

1) If he gets preoccupied and forgot, than I can remind him once.

2) If the task doesn’t have the same importance to him as to me and he will get to it when he gets to it, I found is wiser will wait a while, than remind him with a kiss.

3) If there is something going on that is not covered by option 1or 2, than keeping in mind the different ways men and women define what constitutes nagging, I try finding a non-naggy way to get the task done. I am very good at hiring people.

4) If he consistently blowing me off then... he is mad. Most often, he is mad because he feels disrespected. This is the tricky part. I can get mad back or I can acknowledge his feelings and how my behavior/attitude is affecting him, even if I have done nothing disrespectful from my point of view and change it. Keep in mind men think weird.

5) If he is just being a self-centered pain in the patootie, it happens. I want to be loved even when I am in self-centered patootie mode. I try to be kind but firm in mentioning the patootieness. Sometimes I blow up. All in all kindness works better in the long run even if blowing up promises to feel better in the short run.

Very unPC, I know. In the early years of our marriage, if someone had given me the above list, I would have laughed in her face or at the very least behind her back. All husbands are different. I can only speak from my experience, but finding non-naggy ways of relating to my husband has helped me a lot. I haven’t had to hire anyone to take out the garbage in years.

Anyone have a different or similar view? Be nice....I uploaded that image, I can figure out how to edit comments...if I have to.



I uploaded the I Love Your Blog image all by my lonesome! I just wish I knew how I did it. Thanks to my resident tech geek. I guess I am learning after all. Man, am I proud of myself.

My Own Personal Tech Wizard

Of Motherhood and Technology

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